I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
