with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
