Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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