he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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