So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
tell your sister to shave her snatch
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
