And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You may now shotgun with the bride
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
