if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
