He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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