i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
This baby is an asshole
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
