I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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