Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
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You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
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Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.