Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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