awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize