There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize