they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Two words: nipple clamps
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