What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
