eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
