My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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