Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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