The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
