i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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