dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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