I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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