So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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