sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
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He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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