you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
