Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
