the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
