sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
