I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
