Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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