She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
