I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
