cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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