She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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