i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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