I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
