Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
