All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
