My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
