I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
