I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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