It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize