What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
