We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
