You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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