We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
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Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
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Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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