Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Dear god my vagina.
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