A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
