Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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