I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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